Transcript of Oct. 11, 1999
Chat with David Silberkleit on Yahoo.com.:(Note: About 50 people attended this chat.
Most questions were posted by the Fortune Host after screening
and compiling questions from the audience.)
FortuneHost: David
Silberkleit should be joining is momentarily. This is going to
be a great discussion.
FortuneHost:
There's great energy
in the room!
FortuneHost:
Lots of intelligent
questions!
FortuneHost:
David is joining us
now.
FortuneHost:
Welcome, David!
FortuneGuest: David Silberkleit:
Hello everybody!
FortuneHost:
David, leaving
Archie was a big decision. What led up to your decision?
FortuneGuest: David Silberkleit:
Leaving was a very, very complex process and a very difficult
decision to make. But ultimately my reason for leaving was to
honor what I see as my truth, to put myself in a structure and
environment where I could truly flourish.
FortuneHost:
Did you feel any
family pressure to stay with the business?
FortuneGuest: David Silberkleit:
The family pressure to stay in the business was subtle.
FortuneHost:
Can you tell us more
about that.
FortuneGuest: David Silberkleit:
My father was certainly not pushing me to stay. He wasn't taking
me aside and telling me that I was breaching some family contract,
yet I knew from many conversations with him through the years,
that it was important to him. I know that my father was
particularly conscious of his relationship with his dad, who died
in 1986 -- that would be Louis, my grandfather, who was the
co-founder of the company. And I know that my father felt, deep in
his heart, that his father would have been very proud to see me
staying with the company. Because my grandfather was dead, that
was all the more significant.
FortuneHost:
How did your mother
feel?
FortuneGuest: David Silberkleit:
She was always the free spirit in the family, and she was also
very strongly the voice of truth and authenticity in the family.
There was no pressure from my mother to stay in the business. If
anything, all she ever wants is for me to take the best care of
myself and to honor what's truthful for me. In many ways, it's my
mother's contribution to me that had me take the leap to leave.
FortuneHost:
Was there a
particular turning point for you where you said, "I have to
make a change?"
FortuneGuest: David Silberkleit:
For me, looking in the mirror and actually acknowledging what was
happening to my face, and starting to really get in touch with the
tension I was carrying in my body, to really look at and be with
the health ramifications of pouring my soul into something that in
my heart didn't feel authentic for me, I would say that's how I
knew it was time to make a change
FortuneHost:
How did you tell
your father?
FortuneGuest: David Silberkleit:
Telling my father was actually very easy because there was no one
catastrophic event. He knew for quite some time that our
relationship was seemingly becoming more of a struggle and less of
a partnership. We certainly had fewer moments being father and son
and I think we both very much wanted to get back to that,
especially since he was an only child, and I am his only son. So
when I actually left, I'm not sure if either of us really believed
it wasn't just a threat or some one-week or one month break, with
me returning to continue as usual. But as we talked more about
what had happened and as we both got to realize that I was serious
about moving on, that was probably the hardest part.
pjlive19 asks:
David, are you a
married man?
FortuneGuest: David Silberkleit:
I'm divorced now, and at the time was married. My wife was
extremely supportive and working in a stable job, which helped
tremendously to cushion the reality of leaving my career.
dave_anyworld asks:
There were a
lot of great things held forth in Archie comics. Why not keep the
tradition?
FortuneGuest: David Silberkleit:
The tradition of Archie does live on. You can still go out and buy
the comic books today. My father and a team of people still make
the products -- and a million copies a month are sold. My
departure in no way interrupted the product line. The only
tradition that was broken was that of a two-generation family
business. It never moved on to the third generation.
FortuneHost: Can you tell us more about your
plans for the future? One of our questioners said it took a great
deal of guts to walk away from Archie.
FortuneGuest: David Silberkleit: I appreciate
the acknowledgement about guts. Leaving Archie was one of the most
challenging decisions I've ever made. In the time since my
departure from Archie, I've used the time to pursue a number of
adventurous activities. For example, I'm a rock climber and a
scuba diver. The fear that I've encountered in those hobbies
doesn’t hold a candle to the fear that I experienced when I
interrupted the path that I was on and walked away from my entire
future as I thought I knew it. I've written quite a bit about some
of these issues on my website, www.empowercoach.com.
In my coaching practice, I counsel executives on many of the
issues that relate to fear, that relate to living an authentic
life that really meshes with your soul. My work today and for the
future is about supporting people to design and lead lives that
really mesh with their authentic selves. I'm also working on a
book "Keeping Up with the Indiana Joneses: 21 Days to an
Adventurous Daily Life." The book is about simple ways to put
adventure back in our daily routine, to start to reclaim the fun
and excitement that many of us miss in adult life.
pjlive19 asks: David, where do you see
yourself in ten years time?
FortuneGuest: David Silberkleit: In ten years,
what I envision is that I will be continuing to develop models to
help other people envision and then execute big changes in their
lives. I've been writing and speaking and coaching executives to
this end, for the past five years. I have a unique perspective
given what I've lived through, and I've supported many, many
people to make difficult changes in their business and personal
lives. Over the next ten years, I will have a larger body of
published work, so that I can reach a larger number of people each
year than I do in one-on-one coaching sessions at present. I would
also like to speak nationally about some of the more subtle pieces
of the Archie story. For example, my father and I have had a quite
remarkable relationship, and the history of that experience makes
a very interesting story of how men communicate and deal with a
massive change in both of their futures. We've gotten to a place
now where we can actually have very intimate conversations about
life, adulthood, and choices we've both made, and it's given us a
very rich kind of relationship. These are the things that I intend
to more fully examine and share over the next ten years.
FortuneHost: There is a lot of talk about the Generation
gap in the workplace today, between GenXers and Baby Boomers, for
instance. Do you think that was an issue for you and your father?
FortuneGuest: David Silberkleit: I'd absolutely say that
there were generation gap issues at Archie. It's a very complex
issue, because each generation provides something of value to the
greater whole. It's only very forward-thinking companies that are
wise enough to set up a structure to truly honor the contribution
that each generation has to provide. In family businesses this can
be very challenging because of all the deep emotional issues that
can get in the way.
all_smiles_10002 asks: when was Archie comics
created?
FortuneGuest: David Silberkleit: Archie was
born in 1941, in a PEP comic book.
jughead83838 asks: Were the characters in
Archie based on real people?
FortuneGuest: David Silberkleit: The
characters were originally drawn by a man named Bob Montana and
many of the characters were based on people that Bob knew at
Haverhill High School in Massachusetts, where he grew up. There
was a wonderful story in the Sunday Boston Globe about ten years
ago about some of those characters who Bob grew up with.
Unfortunately he died in 1975. The characters that Bob drew and
characters that Archie, the company, launched were meant to be
everyman characters, that is to say, my grandfather and his
partner were comic book publishers and pulp novel publishers in
the late 30's and it was their idea to come out with a comic book
character who was believable and representative of everyday
American life. Bob Montana was a fantastic artist, who I'm sure
was inspired by relationships around him. And he did a masterful
job of coming up with a typical teenager and his peers. People
would be better served to go to www.archiecomics.com
and to research the property there. There are also some great
books called the Americana series, which are basically
encapsulations of each decade of Archie's history. For example,
there's a best of the 40's book, which shows Archie's first
appearance and gives a pretty good historical account of how each
character is introduced in the comics. I'm probably better suited
to answer questions tonight about how somebody makes major change
in one's life and steps out of what would have otherwise been a
predictable future.
honketno1 asks: Are Archie cartoons shown
anymore?
FortuneGuest: David Silberkleit:
There is a new cartoon series that I believe is on the air right
now. Sabrina the Teenage Witch is also an Archie property, and
that's been an extremely successful live action and animated
cartoon.
FortuneHost:
Is David's dad out there?
mr_chatmeister asks:
The actress,
Melissa Joan Hart, in Sabrina posed with very little clothing in a
magazine. I hear Archie Comics wanted her to apologize. Did she?
FortuneGuest:
She did personally
apologize to my father, as far as I know.
all_smiles_10002 asks: What made you come up
with the idea of Sabrina? I love that show!!
FortuneGuest: David Silberkleit: Sabrina is a
property that was created in the late 60's at Archie, by, I think
Dan De Carlo. You can write to www.archiecomics.com to ask Dan
specifically how he came up with the idea. My role with Sabrina
was simply in helping to revive the property because she was
dormant in the mid-80's when I joined Archie Comics.
gertster5432 asks:
Have new
characters been added to Archie in recent years?
FortuneGuest: David Silberkleit:
When I was at Archie we constantly looked at bringing new
characters into the books. One of my projects was actually to
bring Sabrina back to life -- that would have been in 1988 -- with
a fantastic artist named Dan Parent, who gave Sabrina a more
contemporary look, and this material allowed me to sell a
development deal for the TV show. It took about six years to
become the TV show that Melissa Hart is in right now.
Sonic the Hedgehog from Sega was another new
property that I suggested we license while I was in the company,
and it's now still a great title for Archie. As I understand it
today, the company is still looking for great characters and
properties that work in a comic book.
FortuneGuest: David Silberkleit:
Another fantastic artist who has worked for Archie for a number of
years, in fact started when I was with the firm, was Rex Lindsey,
who has been exceptionally talented in breathing new life into
Jughead's character.
mr_chatmeister asks: How did you come up with
the names for the characters in Archie comics?
FortuneGuest: David Silberkleit: The name Archie comes from
my father's partner John Goldwater, who recently passed away. He
had a friend, I believe, named Archie and he liked the name, and
he married that name to the character that Bob Montana had drawn.
That character, in the forties, looked an awful lot like Bob
Montana.
PClovesDharma asks: did Montana ever ghost
write anything else we can find?
FortuneGuest: David Silberkleit:
I'm not sure. I would look in the comic buyer's guide.
gertster5432 asks:
How will
Archie change in the next millennium?
FortuneGuest: David Silberkleit:
Again, I have nothing to do with the editorial content – or
anything at Archie -- at the current time, so I don't know
anything about what they have planned for the next millennium, but
you can probably get a sense at www.archiecomics.com. In general,
Archie has always embraced what's current, so I expect that Archie
comic in the next millennium will feature Archie doing whatever
kids are doing throughout America.
FortuneHost:
Looking back on your
years at Archie Comics, was there anything you wish you had done
differently.
FortuneGuest: David Silberkleit:
I have no regrets about what happened at Archie or what happened
at my departure. I don't think I would have done a single thing
differently. It was a joyous experience, and it was also a painful
experience in my departure.
FortuneGuest: David Silberkleit:
and I feel that living through all my emotions, that living
through the entire ride was an enriching experience. After all, I
got to wear a Jughead costume and walk down Broadway in the Macy's
Day parade. I feel like I have lived.
FortuneHost:
Are there any
lessons that people who are afraid to try new things can learn
from Archie characters?
FortuneGuest: David Silberkleit:
I'm not sure that there are many Archie stories these day about
fear and trying new things. Remember, the comic books are
primarily built around humor and entertainment. You will
occasionally find a story, however, in the comic books where any
one of the characters in the Archie family confronts something
very frightening. The topics of fear and risk and courage are
really more the focus of my work now as a coach. You'll find more
about that on my website than on the Archie site. Perhaps that's
why I have no regrets about leaving the company. I had nine years
of fun playing with Archie, and now my work is solely focused on
bringing fun into daily life and also honoring the hard realities
that we all encounter as we try to design a lifestyle that meets
our needs.
FortuneHost:
We're wrapping up
now. Any closing thoughts?
FortuneGuest: David Silberkleit:
It's been a real pleasure to dialogue about these issues. I get
the sense from many people who talked to me about the article inwww.fortunesb.com
that many Americans feel trapped in a job or a lifestyle that
doesn't really match their dreams. It's a real joy to talk about
the Archie story because leaving the company allowed me to learn
so much and now to share what I've learned with other people. In
my work as a coach, it's a real pleasure to support people to make
choices that honor and nurture who they are. And I look forward to
doing that for years to come. I'm proud to be able to relate to my
father as his son again. And I welcome the opportunity to discuss
this issue on other chats.
FortuneHost:
Thank you so much.
This was an intense and interesting discussion. Thanks to everyone
in our audience.
A recent on-line chat on
www.greatoutdoors.com, led by David Silberkleit:
DS (David Silberkleit): Hello! David
here from Empower Executive Coaching
TopRoadie: Hi
Hotrod: Hi...
DS: What I do each day is work with people
around the world as their coach, on all kinds of issues to help them move forward with
more velocity in their lives. My passion, though, is adventure; and generally all my
clients are up to something adventurous, whether it's world-record ballooning flights or,
like Heidi Howkins (headed toward camp 1 on K2, the second highest peak in the
world) which you can find out more about on GreatOutdoors ...
DS: So today, I'm happy to hear what you have
on your minds. I can suggest some ways to be more adventurous in your daily
lifestyle. Ready for questions!
Hotrod: What are your favorite sports?
DS: I'm into just about every adventure sport
featured on this site. Lately, I've been into rock climbing. I'm about 1.5 hrs. from
New Paltz, where the 'gunks' cliffs are located
Hotrod: Do you give lectures, or just work one
on one with clients?
DS: Hotrod, not many lectures but I do lots of
internet programs & lead classes on the phone. My schedule is always posted at
my site, http://www.empowercoach.com
Hotrod: Where's the most interesting place
you've ever been?
DS: Probably the most interesting is Vietnam,
where I spent a month cycling from Hanoi to Saigon. That's a good example of what I was
saying earlier -- the trip was an incredible adventure, but you don't need to go to
Vietnam to discover something new. Lots of my clients work 9-5 jobs, and I often
support them to find an adventure really close to home.
Hotrod: So doing stuff after 5pm. How do you
find clients? Word of mouth?
DS: Yes, 5pm is often the starting bell for an
adventure close to home. There's lots of easy stuff to do, like bringing a cycle to work
and riding after work; or rollerblading at lunch. But what's interesting to me is
the adventures available in relationships and self expression. Can take more work, but is
more rewarding.
Hotrod: How do you work with clients out of
state? Do you have clients you've never met before?
DS: I get clients from lots of sources. Word
of mouth is certainly the biggest. I also get many referrals from existing clients,
because they're all having more fun & making more money than they did before they met
me.
Shadow: What adventure programs did you do for
Heidi Howkins?
DS: I have tons of out-of-state clients and
one in England, a bunch of clients I've never met in person (we work on the phone).
Lots of people like to use the phone -- easier for them to express what's on their mind.
Hotrod: Like pen pals? Are you like a
therapist?
DS: Yes, like pen pals, but we work by phone.
Practical because of cheap phone rates.
DS: With Heidi, we worked a lot on how she
presented herself as a business person, how she could fill in other components of managing
her adventure. She wears so many hats as expedition leader that it was useful for
her to have a partner to bounce ideas off; and ways for her to get the job done &
juggle the different elements of the expedition.
Shadow: To obtain sponsorship and such?
DS: Hotrod, a coach helps move you forward
from where you are. A coach works with functional people to make them extraordinary. A
therapist works with someone who isn't always functional. In a therapist-client
relationship, you often have to venture into the past to resolve unresolved issues. I'm
more like the coach of a team. My job is to optimize the skills of my clients, the same
way that only certain players can play offensive line or defensive back.
DS: Shadow, Heidi and I worked together to
line up sponsors. The relationship with GreatOutdoors is a byproduct of this; but it's not
the sole focus of my work.
Hotrod: Do you ever go on trips with your
clients?
DS: I believe I'll have some trips soon that
will help people of all levels confront the edge of the comfort zone. I'm not
talking about terror, I'm asking people to push the edge, because that's where adventure
occurs .Hotrod, I'm wr king right now to design a series of trips for people to encounter
& experience fear in a new way. From my experience, what stops most people from living
adventurous lives is fear.
Desert_rat: How did you get into this?
Hotrod: Are you seeking other athletes like
her?
DS: Yes, Hotrod, I'm seeking other athletes
like Heidi. I'd like to meet more people who are really living their truth. Heidi's
inspiring because she's absolutely willing to die for what she believes in. That's
probably what makes it extremely likely that she'll succeed in being the first
American woman to summit k2.
Desert_rat: What about her kid?
DS: I believe that Devi will be very proud of
her mother regardless of what happens to Heidi. She is a true pioneer, and for her
that includes motherhood. In fact, if you read her dispatch, probably 6 or 7, she
talks about risk and a higher calling that motivates her to be out there in Pakistan
climbing right now. And that to me is the most powerful source I've witnessed in
any athlete or any client.
Banshee: Could you describe some of the
techniques you use to help your clients add adventure into their lives?
DS: Some of the techniques to add adventure to
your life. Most importantly, be willing to experience everything in your life with
hypersensitivity. There are probably things we do each day that have become routine.
It's revisiting those routines and looking for a new adventure that in fact is the source
of altering your lifestyle.
Desert rat: How did you get started?
DS: Desert rat, I got into this solely because
this is how I live my life. Every minute is an adventure, and believe me it isn't always
fun.
DS: Today I'm having severe neck pain from
some sort of pinched nerve, and even my relationship to pain is dealt with by looking for
some discovery or adventure in that process. Believe me, I'd rather be out climbing
right now than discovering some adventure in pain! But that's what I have today, that's
the adventure I've got. This kind of thinking comes naturally for me, and that's
what makes me well-suited to work with clients to add adventure to their lives. As
far as Heidi's kid is concerned, that's an interesting and often controversial issue.
Again, her passion is so strong for what she believes in, her relationship with her
daughter is actually included in that.
Shadow: I read in your bio that you are a
blimp pilot as well...where did you learn to fly one of those things?
DS: Blimps: I've always dreamed of flying
blimps, and I can be very tenacious. I spent a lot of time with a ground crew when they
were in my area, and they invited me on a ride. I got to fly a blimp on a delivery
flight for 8 hours.
Banshee: How are you able to take some average
Joe corporate guy who thinks he may want adventure in his life, and really enable him to
live it?
DS: Banshee, for an average exec in a
corporate environs, the first step is them wanting some sort of change in their lifestyle
from a boring 9-5 routine. In fact, change is one of the greatest places to look
for adventure. Any time there's an interruption of a routine, there's room for an
adventure. I haven't met a client yet who didn't have a dream. And that dream is often
easily converted to an adventure. I'm fortunate that I've been around the
world on enough different kinds of trips that I often work with clients to create a trip
of their own that will fulfill a dream.
DS: Does anyone here want some personal
coaching right now?: I'm happy to engage any of you on a personal-specific issue around
adventure.
Banshee: When these clients come to you, do
you just plan a trip for them, or is there some sort of psychological training that they
go through with you as well?
DS: Banshee, again, I'm not a psychologist.
I'm a coach. So there's no real formal training that I provide for my clients. Think
of an Olympic coach working with a star athlete. The coach doesn't need to train an
athlete, but he's looking for an edge. Perhaps nutrition or equipment, something
that will provide a winning performance.
Desert_rat: Fear of falling.
DS: OK Desert_rat, do you want to engage in a
conversation about fear of falling?
Desert_rat: Sure
DS: I rappelled on Saturday off a 200-foot
cliff overhanging such that my feet never touched the rock.
Desert_rat: I'm a good climber, I just get
afraid sometimes and I feel like it's holding me back
DS: Where do you climb, inside or out?
Desert_rat: Outside; Mostly sport.
DS: Is there a gym near you where you can
practice taking some big falls? That way you can work at a controlled pace instead
of several hundred feet up.
DS: Obviously, big falls in the gym are
nothing like you'd experience sport climbing. I know that from water skiing, for
example, unless I was willing to fall, I could never improve my ability as a slalom skier.
Desert_rat: Yeah, i suppose I could, but it's
usually the landing part that worries me. Like decking.
DS: Again, in the gym in a controlled environs
with a good belay partner, there's no risk of decking. I'd practice intentionally falling
5 feet above your last clipped piece of gear to simulate a lead fall, then gradually
increase your height above the pro so you can gradually get more comfortable
Desert_rat: That's the other issue, trusting
my belayer. I've seen some big falls come from belayer error.
DS: Looks like you need to get a new belayer
and eliminate the weak link in that process. An inexperienced belayer is not
supporting you to have a breakthrough in your relationship with falling.
Desert_rat: Yeah, you're right. Thanks a lot.
I really appreciate the advice.
Desert_rat: Can I e-mail you from your
website?
DS: I know when I first started climbing
outside, the challenges were so massive that I've never had to face fear at that level
before. The first time I rappelled, for example, I spent quite a while noticing how
the fear coursed through my body. I knew what I needed to do, but I'd never
experienced it before. Now, the interesting thing about climbing is to constantly stay on
the edge of my comfort zone.
DS: If I push too far into the terror zone, it
stops being fun. But climbing provides so many challenges, that there's always a new
increment to engage. And that's what has me grow as a climber, and keep experiencing
new levels of fear in a responsible and controlled way.
DS: For example, it would not be useful for me
to rappell off some big wall climb in Yosemite right now. 200 feet straight down is the
max I've experienced to date. I'd be willing to try 250-300 next. but it doesn't
serve me to throw myself into something that's so confronting that my body just gets
overwhelmed. And this is the essence of incorporating an adventurous lifestyle into
any routine, to be able to look for increments that keep you on the edge of the comfort
zone.
DS: Those increments are all around us. In
creativity at work, there might be a way to push the envelope.
Hotrod: Like rappelling out of my office
window? ;-)
DS: In a relationship with a significant
other, it's possible to relate to that person as if today were the first day you'd met
them. That's an adventurous day!
DS: Yep, Hotrod. Fortunately my window's only
about 30 feet up so I could handle that. A high-rise might be a bit extreme, though ...
Hotrod: I like that idea. the relationship
thing
DS: And yes, Desert rat you can mail me
anytime from my website.
DS: Also, the essay about fear of rappelling
is called "The Grip of Fear" and is in the essays section of my site. I
wrote about experiencing fear fully in that essay. I was really scared. In fact,
experiencing fear is the only way not to be stopped by it!
DS: Hotrod, anything specific about
relationships you want to throw out?
Hotrod: I like the analogy you made about
making every day an adventure
DS: Novelty is adventurous, so anything new is
an adventure
Hotrod: I feel that way with my children.
every day seems like a new adventure to them.
DS: If you remember the first time you met a
best friend or lover, the novelty makes it exciting. So I coach clients all the time to
look for novelty in their daily routine.
DS: Kids are the perfect example. To them,
every moment is adventurous. Too few adults have a child-like quality. It's the essence of
fun & adventure.
DS: We're going to be ending in a few minutes.
Any final questions?
Hotrod: Thanks...
DS: Feel free to e-mail me or visit my site.
I'll also be leading phone classes on this topic through the rest of the year. You can
also participate in a free phone conversation like this one
Desert rat: Super chat. Thanks a lot.
Banshee: Thanks, David
DS: Thanks to everyone for participating. This
is a broad topic and hopefully we'll do more with it on
GreatOutdoors.com in the future.
DS: Thanks again!
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